If you ever cared at all about Misandry, engage.
Often I find myself contemplating how different aspects of social justice relate to each other. Gender and gender identity are related. Race and class are related. Ability and fat are related. But something struck me recently about how gender is different than every other one.
Gender issues affect half of the population.
You can be white and not come into contact with very many people of color. You can be straight and not come into contact with very many gay people. You can be cis and not come into contact with very many trans* people.
If you are a man, it is almost impossible that you will not come into contact with very many women.
I wonder how that changes the dynamics.
I don’t like pranks. I never have. I probably never will. Today, I kind of figured out why.
Sometimes, pranking is funny. Sometimes pranks are just dumb things two people who are close do to each other. They’re all in good humor, and no one gets hurt.
Sometimes, though, pranking is bullying. When someone who doesn’t know you that well tries to pull a prank on you, you have absolutely no idea where it’s going to go. Even if it’s someone you know and like and care about, they aren’t always going to know where to draw the line.
And when someone is a bully? “It’s just a simple/harmless/stupid/whathaveyou prank” is the first line of defense. When someone is trying to justify bullying behavior, they’re going to start with something like this. They’re going to fall back on “women aren’t funny” or “feminists hate humor” or “this kid I’m bullying can’t take a joke”. And I don’t like that.
I don’t like that at all.
David Futrelle of Manboobz wrote this post about Paul Elam and why is terrible, yet again. Naturally, this line is my favorite:
“Elam has not yet revealed what effect this new campaign has had upon his penis.”
Seriously, this guy is a massive tool.
After getting into it with some trolls in the comments, I got to thinking. I thought about gender and sexism and feminism. I thought about race and racism, sexuality and gender identity and heterosexism and cissexism. I thought a lot of things about a lot of things, but the thing that I thought about the most was how feminism doesn’t really need more women.
Just go with it for a minute.
Women, in a patriarchy, don’t have social power as a class. We can write about sociology until our fingers fall off, we can attend protests and organize fundraisers and volunteer our time to worthy organizations, but at the end of the day it’s up to men to not abuse their social power. It’s up to men to decide women are people (and plenty of them do). It’s up to men to talk to each other about this issues and to understand that secondary gain is hurting everyone in the long run.
Feminism doesn’t need me to deal with women’s issues.
I still will, obviously. Every little bit helps, and I like thinking that I’m helping. But you know what? The MRM just makes me so hopping mad sometimes. There are men in my life that I like, that I care about very deeply, men that I even love, and the MRM doesn’t do jack shit to help them. Whining about how unfair it is that a woman won’t please your boner on command isn’t doing jack shit.
One could argue that blogging isn’t activism, but (a) this isn’t my primary daily activity (or even my primary weekly or monthly activity – this blog is still mostly joke for now) and (b) I don’t have a whole lot of time or resources for real world activism right now. The best thing I can do right now is analyze shit and provide resources.
I’d like to do that.
What I really want to do, really, is to do more to help men than all of the MRM combined. While having a vagina. See, people like to think that feminism can’t help men. But it can. It does. I’d like to make that voice just a little bit louder.
I guess what I’m getting at is that I hate the MRM for pretending to care about men and then not, closely followed by I intend to actually blog about some stuff that might help men. Hopefully.
The moon still has gravity.
Joyous Holiday of your Choice,
P.S. In New Age-y stuff the sun is masculine and the moon is feminine, but in old Norse the genders of the Aesir associated with these celestial bodies were reversed.
I know he’s supposed to be a Manboobz troll, but I fuckin’ love that guy. He is by far my favorite of all the posters on Manboobz, and I like a whole hell of a lot of them. (Myoo even drew me a birthday present.)
I don’t know what it is about him. He just makes me so happy.
- conditional statements
- THE JABBERWOCKY
- the word “dude”
- hard chairs (HOW COULD I FORGET THESE?!)
This list will be updated at will*.
*Will = random
What it is: A persuasive argument* that uses any combination of ethos, pathos, or logos.
What it is not: Spending hours asserting that a word means two opposing things simultaneously, mocking a community at which you sock puppet for believing that your comment account was a sock puppet, whinging on and on about how feminists made you RAGE QUIT your dreams, and topping it all off with a faux-quip about honing rhetoric skills against easy targets.
*A persuasive argument as a rhetorical act is not the same thing as the type of argument you have when you’re fighting with someone.
This post is sponsored by the Manboobz troll, Steele.